FAQ "Are you done?"

I am frequently asked if we are done adopting?  I find this an incredibly difficult question to answer.  I know that Mike and I feel like the answer is YES, are lives are very full and busy and crazy!  Four children is a perfect number--a full and fun house, an even number, yet not completely chaotic.  I've been thinking about posting this question for a few weeks now.  Maybe, my honest and transparent answer will minister to or help someone out there reading. Bringing home Hudson was a huge adjustment for our family.  All the kids were in school every day.  I work 2 twelve hour shifts so I had many days to keep a clean and organized house, drive on field trips at the kids' school, have lunch with friends, run, listen to my ipod, read books, and do whatever I felt like doing.  We weren't paying on an adoption loan or for any childcare during the days I work.  We didn't buy diapers or soymilk(he's allergic to regular milk).  Our minivan fit us perfectly and now it is cramped.  We didn't have to have a stroller, carseat or diaper bag.  Convenience-wise, things were getting really good.  Carter is in 8th grade and has lots of after school activities that are very difficult to juggle with all the children and our work schedules.  Dragging a 2yr old to football games, guitar lessons, and track meets isn't exactly fun!

BUT

Not one single place in the Bible does it talk about the goal for our lives is to be convenient, easy, indulgant for me.  I promise you it doesn't, I've read it through many times.   Mike and I want to follow and honor Jesus, no matter what. Right now we do not feel like we are called to adopt another child and we are quite content with our family. But, to use Jesus' own words "not my will, but thy will be done."  When Hudson came home, it was HARD.  Anyone who thinks it is easy to bring home a 2 yr old from another culture and country is not being realistic.  Those first few nights home I cried and wondered what on earth we had done to our sweet little family!  Now that it has been 6 months, we are in the swing of things.  Hudson is the most amazing 2yr old boy.  He is so happy and cheerful.  Oh, yeah, he can be incredibly stubborn, but we know he'll make a great leader someday.  I wouldn't trade anything for the blessing of kissing his fat cheeks, seeing him giggle hysterically when Carter does something funny, seeing how he and his siblings play together, watching his cheeks jiggle when he walks fast, having a sweet toddler taking a nap next to me as I type this, hearing him ask "Why?" just because he's heard Dillon say that.  I'm so thankful that we are the lucky ones God chose to bring him home!

So, are we done? 

I really think so.  Of course, we will never say no to God's call on our lives, but it is just too difficult for us to juggle everyone's different age levels, needs, schooling(homework is a huge drag for me!), extra-curricular activities and such.  And who can forget that Carter will be driving in 2 years and then there is college!!  If I didn't have to work(I have to for good group insurance and I want to cause I love being a nurse) then adding another child would be much easier. There's just not enough of me.  If we had the resources, would I love to adopt a special needs toddler girl(maybe from Ethiopia) and use the girl name I've been saving for a long time?  You betcha!  But, honestly, I think our family is complete.  Mike travels several times a year with his work and I always feel like I'm a burden asking my mom, Mike's mom, my sisters, and my friends to help with keeping kids and taking them where they need to go.

What's next?

Well, as you all know, Mike and I have a huge love for missions. I constantly think about the 143million orphaned children in the world.  We would love to be able to take more mission trips overseas.  I think we will start praying and saving for another trip next year.  We both love Nicarauga and I'd return to Haiti very soon if I was offered a free trip!